60 Minutes did a story on Sunday about the government’s “No Fly” list. It’s supposed to be an intelligence document used to prevent terrorists from boarding planes. The list however contains so many names (over 44 thousand) that it seems as if someone was trying to cover his ass by bulking it up rather than creating a comprehensive record of potential threats. I went online and found this 734-page document, randomly chose one page and transcribed it here for you:

-Mohammed Faisal Abdul
-Mohammed Paula Abdul
-Apu
-Guy who sang “Moon Shadow”
-Freddy “Boom Boom” Washington
-The Terminator
-The Yankees (Go Orioles!)
-T2
-Amanda Johnson (and all dick-teases)
-People traveling with small, loud children
-Ugly flight attendants
-Penguins
-People who don’t like Dr. Pepper.
-People who think they’re the shit for solving high-difficulty Sudokus quickly
-The Dave Matthews Band