There’s a new asshole in town. They call him the Douchebag and he’s here for the long haul.
Some people think that assholes and douchebags are one and the same. Not true. The word “asshole,” becoming prominent in the late 60s, refers to a person, typically male, who intentionally behaves like…well… like an asshole. Whether he’s the guy cutting you off in his Beemer, your delinquent ex-husband or Donald Trump.
The word “douchebag,” employed by sophisticated linguists since the early 80s, is fairly new to the mainstream and casts a wider net than the word “asshole.” A douchebag is by nature an asshole but takes being an asshole a step further. A douchebag can also be someone clueless of his own douche-y behavior. You’ll see him singing along to Mony Mony, attaching a spoiler to his IROC-Z or starring in The Real World: Denver. Basically, all assholes can be considered douchebags, but all douchebags are not exactly assholes.
It’s time for everyone to accept the word “douchebag.” The earth is packed too tightly with idiots to be limited to only one major pejorative moniker. And I realize that some of you are uncomfortable saying “douchebag” because of its literal definition, but think of what “asshole” means literally. You don’t have a problem throwing around that expression at a hockey game. We’ve gotten used to the term “asshole” and we’ll get used to “douchebag.” Our modern-day vocabulary demands it. Join me in utilizing it to its full potential.